Pavan’s best friend, Abel, lent his video game to his cousin even though he promised to give it to Pavan. Abel’s cousin visited over the weekend and begged until Abel had no choice but to give it to her. Abel was filled with sadness and trepidation, thinking his best friend would feel betrayed. However, Pavan did not feel angry or betrayed. He understood that Abel had no choice and that Abel could not possibly have denied her as she is family. At only 10, Pavan dealt with the situation amicably and did not let any ill-feeling ruin their friendship.
Pavan and Abel’s story is something that we rarely see. Young kids often give in to their emotions without comprehending them well. Hence, emotional literacy becomes important. Labeling emotions, generally known as ‘emotional literacy’ is an individual’s underlying understanding of emotions. Claude Steiner (2003), expanding the idea of Nancy Graham, said that “to be emotional literate means that you know what emotions you and others have, how strong they are, and what causes them.” Emotional literacy is intelligence at heart. Research shows that labeling helps in emotional regulation and increased self-control (Izard et al., 2001). Denham quotes that without labeling, no distance occurs between feeling and action (Denham, 1996). So, let us explore the reasons that make it necessary for you to help your kids learn labeling their emotions.
Here’s why kids should learn labeling their emotions.
1. Better communication
The underlying fact when it comes to labeling emotions is communication. ‘Naming and Speaking’ emotions is important. Labeling emotions allows children to understand their emotions and express themselves better. Once a child is able to understand how she or he is feeling, it becomes easier to be seen or heard.
Labeling your kids’ emotions helps in validating their feelings or emotions; so your kids feel emotionally safe when they do not face outright dismissal from your side, laying a strong foundation for healthy conversations. However, some research studies do suggest that labeling emotions or validating can be harmful in some cases.
2. Emotional intelligence
A higher IQ helps kids perform better academically; it is equally important to have higher EQ, i.e., emotional quotient. Labeling emotions helps children develop higher EQ which is the ability to perceive, understand and regulate own as well as other’s emotions. Such children are emotionally competent.
Labeling emotions works as the first stepping stone in acquiring higher emotional intelligence. Rather than find objective yes or no answers to problems, emotionally intelligent children are able to rely on their judgment and find answers. Research study shows that children with high emotional intelligence are more empathic, perform better in school and have better interpersonal relationships (Raver et al., 2007).
3. Managing emotions
Not only does labeling emotions help kids to manage their emotions better, but it helps kids to get eventual control of the situation. Once a child is able to name the emotion he or she is feeling, the child can initiate an effective way to deal with the emotion or seek solution.
For instance, if certain things cause your kid discomfort and they are able to communicate the same with you, you will be able to immediately help them resolve the issue and achieve the feeling of comfort. Researches also show that labeling emotions help in reducing distress (Burklund et al., 2014).
Recommended reading: How To Teach A Child To Regulate Emotions
Recommended reading: Don’t Restrict Your Son’s Emotions
4. Healthy relationships
Better understanding of emotion and emotional regulation fosters healthy relationships. Labeling emotions helps kids learn empathy and they are able to fit themselves in someone else’s shoes. When kids understand how others too feel what they feel and that no one can escape emotions, they are able to not let it fester the relationships.
For instance, once kids understand how certain actions of their parents hurt them, conversely, their own actions sometimes hurt the parents too, they can adopt effective ways to communicate and solve the problem rather than stewing in a cauldron of their own emotions. This helps them foster healthy relationships with peers, parents and others.
5. Language and cognitive development
Labeling emotions have been related to language and cognitive development. Once you start making your kids label their emotions, their vocabulary enhances. Emotions and language are deeply connected and influence each other, as shown by many research studies.
Similarly, a better understanding of emotions helps your kids evolve their cognition. As labeling or understanding emotions is not something that is innate but rather an acquired skill learnt over a period of time, it helps in cognitive development of children.
Conclusion: Kids should learn labeling their emotions
Epitomizing the article, the importance of emotion labeling can be understood and parents should actively make a conscious effort to make their kids emotionally literate. Being a good role model, naming your own emotions, playing games, singing songs, reading books, etc., can be applied to help them learn to label emotions.
