Has your entire day ever got ruined because of that judgmental relative of yours who questioned your career choices? Or your dressing sense? Or your parenting style?
We all have been judged by people at one point in time or another. Judgmental people make some nasty comments that are enough to question your entire existence on this planet. You must, however, remember that judgments are mere opinions and not facts.
Avoiding a judgmental person is easy when you have to meet them occasionally, such as a relative you encounter only at a family function. When that person is someone you see every day, such as your colleague, things become a little complex. You may, therefore, make use of these tips to deal with them in a better way.
1. Ask Questions
Next time someone passes a judgment, ask them what makes them say such a thing. Suppose someone said your parenting style is inappropriate; ask them what exactly is wrong with it? You will notice that they’ll not be able to explain their judgmental statement/opinion after a certain point. This will prove the point that their judgment is irrational and a result of their own limited opinions.
Recommended reading: Don’t Let Society Tell You How To Live
2. Tell Them Directly
Communicating what you feel when the person passes judgments on you, can make that person aware of the impact their comments have. Most often, judgmental people do not know they are judgmental. Next time try to tell them directly that you do not like their judgmental attitude. Chances are they’ll get defensive or may laugh it off. However, there is a high possibility that they’ll be careful next time they talk to you.
3. Forgive Them
Worse judgments come from those who are closest to us. For instance, if you are a parent, chances are your relatives judge you for your child’s behavior. “Your child can’t recite nursery rhymes yet? My child was able to recite them when he was five years old”. A study proved that in India, parents are judged for their child’s behaviour “very often”. Next time someone judges you, tell them that you feel hurt when they do that. If they don’t change their behaviour, forgive them to deal with such judgmental people.
4. Understand Them
Judgmental people think passing judgments is normal. This is because they have been judged by their parents, teachers, or colleagues all their life. Research suggests that judgmental people usually have a self-critical attitude where they constantly judge their own thoughts and feelings. You must, therefore, be empathetic towards them and when they judge you next time, tell them it’s not okay to carry forward the cycle of judgment.
5. Bid them goodbye
If the judgmental person doesn’t change, it’s high time you cut them off. It’s going to be hard to bid goodbye to people who are closest to you, so define boundaries with them to deal with these judgmental people.
Judgments are nothing but limited opinions people have for other people. Hope these tips help you get rid of negative people in your life.
