Getting triggered by kids?
Sounds like you need a parenting intervention!
Just kidding, we all get triggered by our kids from time to time. It’s perfectly normal.
In fact, it can even be helpful if it motivates you to make positive changes in your parenting.
So what exactly is getting “triggered?”
Getting triggered is when something sets off a reaction in you that is out of proportion to the situation. It’s like your buttons have been pushed, and you can’t help but respond in a certain way.
For example, let’s say your child spills their milk at breakfast. If you get angry and yell at them, that’s getting triggered. Or if you cry because you’re feeling overwhelmed, that’s getting triggered too.
There are many things that can trigger us as parents.
It might be something our kids do, like throwing a tantrum in public or refusing to eat their vegetables. Or it might be something we’re reminded of from our own childhood, like feeling inadequate or not good enough.
Recommended reading: 7 Parenting Mistakes That Can Cause Childhood Trauma
Recommended reading: How Your Childhood Trauma Impacts Your Parenting Style
Why do we get triggered?
There are a few reasons we might get triggered by our kids.
Sometimes it’s because we’re tired, stressed, or just having a bad day. Other times it might be because we’re worried about something in our own lives and feeling vulnerable.
Maybe we have unresolved issues from our own childhood that are being brought up by our kids’ behavior.
For example, if we were never allowed to express our anger as kids, we might have a hard time managing it as adults.
Being a parent in itself can be triggering. It’s an enormous responsibility, and there’s so much pressure to do everything perfectly.
We might also feel like we’re not living up to our own standards or the standards of others.
What can we do about it?
The first step is to become aware of what sets you off. Pay attention to the times when you feel yourself getting triggered and try to notice what’s going on around you.
Once you’ve identified your triggers, you can work on managing them. This might mean taking a break when you’re feeling overwhelmed, communicating with your partner about your triggers, or seeking professional help if you’re struggling to cope.
It’s also important to remember that your triggers are not your kids’ fault or yours. They’re just a normal part of being a parent. So try to be gentle with yourself and give yourself some grace. We all make mistakes, and that’s okay.
Recommended reading: Importance of Mother’s Mental Health for Child
Recommended reading: The Impact of Parental Discord and Maladjustment on Children’s Behavior
Remember, it’s normal to get triggered by your kids from time to time. We all have our buttons, but it’s how we deal with them that makes the difference. By realizing our triggers and learning to manage them, we can become better parents — and better people.
Parenting is hard work, but it’s also one of the most rewarding things you’ll ever do. So hang in there, mama. You got this.
