It’s been really long, but I still remember how creatively I was taught about the idea of consent. It was when my dad showed me how ‘touch me not plant’ enclosed its leaves on being touched. He didn’t introduce the word consent back then but made sure that I get an understanding of valuing physical boundaries.
Why Should You Teach Your Child About Consent?
1. Firstly, teaching our children about consent helps them understand their own values and beliefs about physical boundaries, mutual respect for others, and building healthy relationships.
At its core, consent is simply permitting something to happen. This might be asking for permission to hug someone or asking if you can borrow something from them.
2. Secondly, teaching children about consent also means teaching them why it is important to respect other people’s bodies and boundaries. Only when you respect yours, you can respect other people’s boundaries.
In the long run, teaching kids about consent can help prevent sexual assault and harassment. By teaching our children that they need to ask for and receive consent before engaging in any kind of physical contact with someone, we can help them understand that this is a boundary that should not be crossed.
3. Additionally, by teaching our children that they have the right to say no and that their body is theirs alone, we can help them see themselves as powerful individuals who are in control of their own choices.
Start the conversation early, and help your child learn to respect themselves and others so that they can grow up to be respectful, self-aware and caring adults who know how to set healthy boundaries.
Now the big question – teach your child about consent?
How Should You Teach Your Child About Consent?
Of course, through consent conversation and making sure that you don’t miss out on these aspects:
1. Knowledge Of Bodily Autonomy
No, we don’t want your pre-school child to know about this heavy word now, but what we do want is you to tell them what this means. Teach them that they own their body, and they get to decide who is allowed to touch them. They have all the right to say no if they feel uncomfortable with someone’s touch or forced affection on their personal property, that is their body. Teach your child about ‘safe’ and ‘unsafe touch’. Talk to your child about rape and sexual abuse.
Recommended reading: Teach Your Child About Good Touch And Bad Touch
2. Voicing Up
Now that you have taught your kids that they have sole right on themselves, teach them how to react if they don’t want to give consent. It’s important to firmly say no without feeling guilty. Make them aware of situations when they can be easily bribed by some chocolates or gifts to give forceful consent. They might also encounter situations where someone forces them despite their resistance. Prepare them for such hard times and that they voice up and approach you for help if something like that occurs.
Recommended reading: Top 5 Books To Teach Your Child About Consent
3. Introducing Empathy
Consent is a two-way street, and thus it’s important to teach children to be empathetic, to put themselves in someone else’s shoe as well. This ensures that they get to know the perspective of both the consent receiver and the consent giver. It’s equally important to understand that not everyone can say no that easily. In such situations, if you find someone getting uncomfortable, avoid crossing that boundary.
4. Respecting a No
For someone who grew up watching Bollywood movies, it was not unusual to see someone forcing their love and affection without the other person’s consent. What they failed to portray was that consent is not only respecting one’s own body but other’s bodies as well. It’s always the owner of the body that gets to decide how and when they wish to get touched and loved, depending on what they are comfortable with. It’s equally important to understand that they too can hear a ‘no’ from someone, and that must be respected.
5. Show Not Tell
How can you expect your child to learn the nitty-gritty of consent if you don’t implement them on yourself. At times, though unintentionally, parents don’t respect their children’s consent. Think of the times when your child was hesitant to hug a relative or friend, but you pushed them to do so anyway. So, the next time your child says no to things like that, respect their decision. This way, you practically show them how the process of consent works and that’s how you will teach your child about consent.
Conclusion: Teach Your Child About Consent
So, you see, teaching about consent is not rocket science if you make them a part of daily activities by asking for their agreement on small things. The most fundamental idea of consent rests on valuing each other’s boundaries and not doing anything against someone’s will. As the child enters teenage years, introduce them with sexual consent to save them from misinformation. A conscious effort from your end not only makes a child aware of their right, but also saves them from being victims of various child abuses.
